We’ve all seen the commercial – our favourite fast-talking felon is back with a new cleaning tool that will solve all of life’s problems for the low, low price of $19.95 (plus shipping and handling of course). Well, I ordered one and released a video on my YouTube channel for all to see. This blog post will explain the hilarious details of the video. Enjoy!
My Street Cred
I pride myself on my ability to evaluate a cleaning tool. In fact, I have an intimate understanding of them. If you don’t know, I’ve run Clean My Space, a Toronto-based cleaning company, for the past 5 years. I did all of the cleaning for the first couple of years and have had my share of experience with both good and bad cleaning tools.
At my company, we always remind our clients that we need the right tools to do the job properly. I’ve tested these tools vigorously and know what works. So, want to know what I think of the Schticky?
Box opened: the build quality was ‘meh’ at best. It looked like something you would get as a ‘value’ brand or ‘house’ brand (a.k.a. a cheaper alternative to a brand name cleaning tool).
The Little Schticky wouldn’t close properly, so I can only imagine the stuff that would build up between uses rolling around in anyone’s purse or bag. The Schticky itself came with a protective cover, that was better than the little one. The Big Schticky had a larger roll, a telescoping pole and a medieval-inspired rake attachment which is commonly used to pull hair out of carpets (something vacuums are pretty darn good at already). All 3 felt tacky (not an 80’s wedding tacky, sticky tacky) which was good. My fear was that it would decrease in efficacy as it got used and re-washed many times. But hey, Vince says it’s good so I want to give it a fair shake.
Schticking it to the Schticky
Aside from Vince’s awesome choice of vocabulary and carefully-crafted raunchy innuendos, he puts these tools to the test in a variety mundane household cleaning tasks. My husband and I (he’s the Poke-A-Roo that you never see but does about 80% of all the work on our videos) spent a good hour at Wal Mart seeking out the most comparable items we could find that he used in the commercial. We actually filmed every single scene from that commercial but didn’t include all of them in our video review because it would have just been too long. I think we’ll do an outtakes or gag reel one day to show what the rest of the testing revealed. It was hilarious.
The Big Schticky
We used it for the first time under our couch (on 6 inch risers), where the cats often hang out during the day. Hair and debris end up under there so the Big Schticky definitely had appropriate subject matter to work with. It did pick up the hair balls and the debris with a few passes. I went to rinse it off per the commercial. What looked like a 15 second rinse (if that) in the commercial actually took 3 minutes and involved me picking hair off the surface. Ok, whatever, on to the next.
Breaking the Fast
He then schtickies (yes, don’t you know Schticky is now an adjective?) up some cereal from the floor. Well, he must have used wheat-coloured stones because when I sprinkled some Special K on the floor and applied standard pressure, the tool crushed the Special K, flake by flake. It was like 783 mini dust explosions on the floor. In fact, it made more of a mess and I had to spend time repeatedly rolling over the area to pick up about three quarters of the crumbs. That’s right, there were crumbs left on the floor that the Schticky couldn’t get up and actually made the situation worse. Because the roll surface of it was coated in small crumbs, when I went over the areas to pick up that remaining mess, there was no room to facilitate more pick up. This left me with a dirty floor AND a dirty Schticky. To the sink!
The cereal became a mess in the sink and took a few minutes to entirely remove. Then the sink trap was full of that cereal and I had to empty that before continuing on. I’m not being dramatic, I’m just telling you all the work that went in to that very unsuccessful cleaning task.
Even your CAT Will Love the Schticky
I just didn’t have the heart to use his choice of vocabulary in the header here, but if you’ve seen the commercial you know what he says. Did you throw up in your mouth as well? Anyway, I sprinkled about 4 tablespoons of kitty litter on the floor and tried to schticky it up. The results were not good. Rather than grab the Schticky, I would be more inclined to grab a broom and sweep up the litter than use a Schticky and have to rinse it off after. Litter goes all weird on you when it gets wet (it’s designed to do that) it clumps together, gets gelatinous, etc. Why would I choose the Schticky for this task? I was not impressed, especially because litter was still left on the floor afterward and I had to clean out my sink. Compare this to sweeping and dumping.
A Real Penny Pincher.
I ask you, who is so incapable of picking up a few coins off the floor that they would need to grab their ol’ money picker-upper from the closet. ‘Oh shucks Philip, the coins fell on the floor again, get the Schticky!’ Even if you are physically unable to pick up a coin from a floor, there are other options that are more effective and lower maintenance than the Schticky. I’ll tell you, we had about 25 pennies on the floor and I had to roll over them multiple times before the Schticky got them all. Once I finally had them and walked over to the sink, they all started falling off like raindrops. The few that stayed on were most definitely on, they stuck on for dear life even when being blasted with water for a few minutes. It’s a money magnet (for Vince).
The Regular Schticky
Then we move on to the regular-sized Schticky. We sprinkled a tablespoon of dried basil on the counter, spread it out and divided it in half. I wanted to test half of it using a traditional clean up method (paper towel) and the Schticky to see which one was more effective (and lower maintenance). The Schticky required multiple passes and did not pick up every last basil flake. I then used a dry paper towel folded into quarters. With my other hand I caught the falling herbs. Voila, took literally a third of the time and got all the basil off the counter. Done and done. Thankfully I was right by the sink because guess what came next? A bath for the Schticky; it’s like a high maintenance puppy.
No, my couch isn’t crummy. In fact, it’s a gorgeous new couch we purchased after months of saving from Restoration Hardware and we adore it. I crumbed up one of the arms, taking comfort in being a cleaning expert and knowing that a few crumbs couldn’t stump me. Much like cereal on the floor (we used Special K again), the Schticky steam rolled over that cereal and crushed it to bits, grinding crumbs into the sofa. Come on, really? Even with multiple passes, a few simple pieces of cereal became a major clean up job. Let it be known that I had to bring in reinforcement after the camera went off. I used a lightly dampened microfibre cloth to get the rest of the crumbs off. Waste.of.time.
Debris (pourri) on Carpet
I have allergies and potpourri is one of those things that just gets right into my nose and stays there, making me sneeze, sniffle and tear all day long. I was a little annoyed that this was part of the test but I trudged through. Why, oh why, I would choose a Schticky to clean this up over a vacuum is still a mystery but regardless, I continued. The Schticky picked up some potpourri, yes, but it also leapfrogged some of the potpourri out to other parts of the carpet which took my isolated cleaning zone (area of spill) to a larger area that I now had to clean up. Of course, it was picking up the potpourri but left a lot behind, and I had to (wait for it), clean up the rest of it after I got frustrated with the results. It’s kind of like a reverse infomercial; ‘Do you get annoyed when you can’t pick all of your potpourri up with your Schticky? Then you need a vacuum!’ Indeed, in that moment, I really needed a vacuum. Off to the sink, seeya.
Schticking it to my Husband
Yes, yes, I really wanted to do this. So, we crumbed up his shirt (he put the camera on autopilot) and I schtickied his shirt. Yep, it worked. Performed the same way as a lint roller would have, save for me having to run to the sink (yet again) to clean it off. Our neighbours must think we’re really strange (we run around the house with a bunch of camera equipment on the regular). We didn’t bother including this footage in the video, but check the gag reel, we’ll probably put it in there. It was hot.
I tested this on a few things too, including Malee herself (my non-camera shy cat). It picked up a few hairs off her back, but again, why use it when I have a great cat hair brush that she loves already (and that I don’t have to clean in the sink)?
I then tested it on my husband’s shoulder (think: Jay Z’s ‘Dirt off your Shoulder’) and it was fine. Again, something a lint roller could do with less post-task maintenance.
Is it Sticky?
Admittedly, I’m no MLB pitcher; I don’t have a ‘pitching arm’. But I can tell a hoax when I see one. I whipped that Schticky at my wall at least 10 times and not once did I remotely have a shot at getting it to stick to the wall. Then I got annoyed with that procedure and walked up to the wall and slapped it right on. I wanted to see if the Schticky actually stayed on the wall per the commercial (I wasn’t ambitious enough to try and kill a roach at the same time) and I will tell you, that Schticky slowly rolled its way down my wall. It didn’t stay static for 3 seconds before it started to head south.
My Issues with Schticky
Advertised for $19.95 means about $40 when you factor in shipping, handling, processing for the Big Schticky (but wait, there’s more) and taxes.
Nope, I already have a great broom, vacuum and lint roller. No need for a Schticky.
Be environmentally friendly
Dead wrong. You waste tons of water trying to get the thing clean. One small omission from the commercial.
Saves you time
Need I recap my experience? I spent more time cleaning up after the Schticky than I did actually cleaning. This claim is laughable.